Posts tagged personal.

Why do we take photographs? To remember something that won’t happen again. To capture a memory. So that one day you can look back at them and wonder. My sister discovered a box of old photos and as we laughed and looked through them something struck me. Some of those people in the photos don’t exist in my life anymore. Or my parent’s life. I’m still so young, but not too young to understand that people can exit your life as easily as they entered it. Relationships turn sour and people drift apart. But as I looked at those photos I could only remember that once they were a part of my life. Remembering how my mom probably told everyone to stand together as she took a picture, or how I felt that day, or how simple things were in that moment. I don’t think a lot about the future, about how my relationships will turn out anyway. 

I bought my camera over a year ago. I have over a year worth of memories, and every time I look through my photos I can only remember how I felt during that moment. I don’t know what I wanted to do with my camera when I first bought it, I only remember how elated I was that after months of saving the moment I was waiting for had finally come. I am still learning and I am nowhere near as good as I want to be. I don’t take it seriously enough. But with each stolen moment. Each candid shot. Each memory. Each photograph is a moment that I’ll never get back. Why do I take photographs? To remember something that won’t happen again? To capture a memory? So that one day I can look back at them and remember? Yeah. So that I can look back and be thankful for the people and moments that have helped me get to where I am today. Because even though it’s over, even if we don’t talk anymore…it happened, I learned, I grew, I’m here today.

(Photo: Lombard Street by My dad circa 1999? Last time we were in SF. He had a film SLR back then…crazy. The only thing I remember from that trip was getting sea sick on the boat and yelling “TAXI!” because I saw it on a Nickelodeon/Nick Jr short, HAHA I was probably 6 or 7, and thought it would work and having to squeeze four of us in the back of a taxi while my dad sat in front)


Dear self,

Stop talking and start doing. Because really, honestly…nothing is going to happen if you don’t take action. I think that my biggest problem is over-thinking things, life is going to happen with or without me, and I wish I could just stop analyzing and start doing. Truth of the matter is that I care too much. I care about how I present myself and how other people perceive me. I’m self-conscious, which is why I think and analyze so much. I suppose I knew this…but being able to admit it has taken some time. I know you shouldn’t care, that the only thing that matters is if you’re comfortable with yourself. But it’s not easy, especially knowing how brutal people can be behind their backs. That’s life, man up Annalyn. You’ve been through tough times before. I’m writing this down to get it off my chest. As a reminder whenever I scroll through my blog. It’s not enough to realize your problems, you really have to do something about them. I’m getting better at it…I think. I’m wearing things I thought I would never wear, I’m trying to develop my own style. Now that I don’t have to wear a uniform everyday, first and second quarter I had a lot of lazy days. But I actually try to plan things to wear that I like because I like it, and that’s all that should matter, even if it seems weird that I’m “dressing up” just for another day. 

I’m not lucky, I’m blessed and most times I forget how blessed I am. Remember that life isn’t hard, that you just make it hard. Most things are temporary. Sometimes the past can come back, but don’t let that stop you from living in the present and looking forward to the future. This is just a random jumble of sentences. Just a few things that I’ve left unsaid. I’m wary about posting personal things on tumblr, I thought about making a blogspot. But this is my (new) tumblr and I made it with the intention of keeping it a personal blog even if lately it’s been posts about what I did today. 

#personal  #blog  



I believe that home really is where the heart is. Although when I return home I know that some of my freedom is being given up…I love home.

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KRANKML Reunited!

I’m glad we got to see each other even if our Spring Breaks aren’t the same. Took cue pictures, I hate how it times you…Melissa put KRAKML the first time so we did a retake. Hung out at Barnes and Noble, then ate at Tofu House. 

End of Winter Quarter

Another quarter has come and gone. I took my last final of the quarter just a few hours ago. I can’t explain how relived I am that Winter Quarter is finally finished, that I am finished with Chem 1B FOREVERRR (BECAUSE I HOPE I ACED MY FINAL). I haven’t been home in weeks and I can’t wait to get back and sit in my own bed and see my dog!…because I kind of miss home. So, only one more quarter left in my first year of college…it’s exciting but at the same time scary. It may seem like a long time from now…but that means soon I’ll have to figure out what I’m going to do with my life. Am I going to stick as a bio major? Should I change to Pharm Sci or Nursing? What do I want to research in? I need to write my internship essay. I need to start moving, the end of a quarter is another wake up call for me to get my priorities in order. But it’s Spring Break…we all deserve a break after such a long and stressful quarter. This is just what I need, a much needed break from class, stress, and pacn practices. 



I admit it’s weird not having someone remind me that today is Ash Wednesday and having a service at a certain time at school, that’s just the kind of thing you get used to going to Catholic school since kindergarten.

But today I remembered not to eat meat while in the commons and to eat only one full meal. I saw people walking around with ashes so I stopped and asked where the Interfaith building was so I could get ashes. It was funny that one of my friends thought the girl she saw in our bio class with ashes on her forehead “just rubbed her pen on her forehead and had ink and just didn’t know it”. I talked to the priest who told me to come back at 5pm for the full service. I was surprised at how many people and how crowded the building was. I came alone but I Marcee saw me and it was nice to know someone. I was honestly surprised at how many people came out to the Ash Wednesday service today because it’s been said that college is where people loose their religion, but I’m pretty sure that all of those people that came out to the service today came out of their free will, like I did. Someone actually asked me what the ashes represent. The homily the priest gave got me thinking about Lent…and about college.

About how much bigger my world has grown, and how much my mentality and thoughts about people have changed. College is about opening your world, and it’s funny but I feel like that has really happened. K-12 most of my friends were filipino and Catholic. Now I’m in college, I still have some filipino friends but I also have diverse friends (and I thought I went to the University of Chinese Immigrants). I still have Catholic friends, but the people that I’m closest too aren’t Catholic. I think I’ve become less judgmental, and more open to new things. I don’t know if I can express what I want to say or how I feel…but if I tried it would be content.

As for what I’ve giving up for Lent…

I’m not sure but I actually had a talk with Stephanie about trying to get something out of Lent, not just giving something up because you have to. I think I’m going to try to live with less, what I mean is stop wanting things that are unnecessary. I’m going to try and make myself a better person this Lent.  

#personal  #blog  

I need to go to Costco and get some more photos printed…

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I’m going to put this as a read more option because some of these photos are from waaay back and they make me laugh.

Sometimes…I find myself hating social networking sites (way back when myspace was still popular, facebook). But they’re so useful for storing old photos that you forget about until you get bored/curious and then it holds a plethora of memories. 

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Children’s Books

I haven’t had so much fun in a while…and I would have never thought it would be from sitting in Barnes and Noble reading children’s books. Sitting, laughing, and remembering the things that made our childhood so great. "That might sound boring, but I think the boring stuff is the stuff I remember the most." It will always be the simple things that make me happiest. 

This is a story about two people. The first person can’t understand why things keep changing. Relationships and people. She realizes that things can’t be the same way that things were before, because things have changed too much. But the second person is tired of things staying the same. He realizes that no matter how long it has been, some things will always be the same as before. 

This is a story of a girl who couldn’t wait for things to change. And now finds herself wishing that some things would stay the same. This is a story of a boy who was hoping that things would change. And now finds that himself feeling the same as always.

This is the story about two friends…who still have a lot to learn.